Herbert’s Cookies & Chips milk chocolate bar: a cookie avalanche into a chocolate ocean

Herbert’s Cookies and Chips chocolateJust like when I was little, the holidays bring to mind holiday food. While most holidays have associated candy, for some reason I hold Easter candy to a higher quality then the rest. Have you ever had a chocolate bunny made of crappy chocolate? It’s like a crime against taste buds!

Now for this unusual cookie/candy thing. The wrapper picture shows round cookies, or flying saucers, the art is weird. But instead of cookies, out came 4 rectangular chocolate squares with big chunks of chocolate and vanilla pieces. The chocolate bar part is about 1/4 inch thick and sweet, and melts in your mouth. The cookie crumbs have a mixture vanilla, milk chocolate and dark chocolate pieces. While the chunks are tasty and the different colors have different flavors is great, I can’t help be distracted by the ‘density’ of the chunks. Density is a weird term but it’s hard to describe how hard the cookie chunks are. They’re more like hard candy then cookie crumbs, I can feel them in every bite. But then again, if they weren’t so hard they would probably get crumbled during shipping and leave a powder in the wrapper.

Despite the extra crunchiness, I can see this being part of a special Easter basket. There’s good quality chocolate, with different flavored chocolate and vanilla bits and it’s unique appearance would make an excellent gift. And if you kept the chocolate side up, then no one would suspect the crumbs on the bottom.

I give Herberts Cookies and Chips candy bar a 4 out of 5!

Rating= 4

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Peeps Torture- microwaving marshmallow peeps

Welcome to the first installment of our special Easter segment, Peeps Torture! Oh, sorry. I meant Peeps Advanced Interrogation Techniques. Better? Not really, but here we go!

From now until Easter, I’m going to find new ways to maim, mutilate and macerate these cute little marshmallow chicks! I figured I first should start with the classic torture- the microwave. Surprisingly, I’ve never actually microwaved Peeps. There are pop culture references to it, but I never got around to doing it. That’s about to change!

Here’s the video of microwaving Peeps for 30 seconds:




Wow, that was actually more than I expected. Microwaving Peeps cause them to fluff up and grow to almost 3 times the size. After about 20 seconds, the Peep starts to deflate. The other 10 seconds was more overkill than anything else. And the coolest part? It tastes awesome! Better than “live” Peeps, these nuked Peeps taste alot like those meringue cookies. Same texture and everything!

Our lesson today- microwaving defenseless marshmallow baby chicks is delicious.

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Too Cheap Food: Dollar Store Beef Jerky

Beef Jerky from Dollar Tree Store“You get what you pay for.” It’s a saying that gets used alot these days. But I like to bend the rules. I’m always scouting for a great deal or a new sale. Slickdeals.net and Woot.com are my friends. But I will admit, sometimes cheaper is not necessarily better. This brings me to our first installment of “Too Cheap Food”!

“Too Cheap Food” is a segment in which we will explore the world of food that is, you guessed

it, too cheap. I’m talking about the clearance basket at the grocery store, the food aisle at the dollar store or any other way to get questionable food at questionable prices.

Today’s judgment: Mystery Brand Beef Jerky from Dollar Tree.

You know you’re in for a treat when your food has no name brand on it. All the package says on the front is “Beef Jerky Original”. But what company will I sue when I get food poisoning send the thank you notes to after I finish off this bag of delicious smoked protein? That’s ok though, at least we get 50% more of this mystery meat! Completely worth it! Oooh! On the back in tiny letters, I found the distributor: Greenbrier International Inc in Chesapeake, VA! Well, now I sure am relieved!

Alright, I ate about half of the jerky and I didn’t get a stomach ache! I did, however, almost get a jaw ache. These this taste smoky and all, but are hard as hell! The package says “Slowly Smoked Over Aged Wood”. I think that’s pretty accurate, but they added one word too many: “over”. This tastes more like “Slowly Smoke Aged Wood”. Honest mistake, don’t beat yourself up over it Greenbrier. Ok, so I am exagerating but this stuff is pretty tough to chew. The flavor is sweet and smoky, but seems to need a little stronger flavor.

As it turns out, 50% more crap still equals out to 150% crap. Amazing!

I give Greenbrier Beef Jerky a 2 out of 5 on the netfoodie.com Awesomeness Meter:

Rating= 2

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Orbit Maui Melon Mint

Orbit Maui Melon Mint GumGum comes in tons of flavors, but I was still surprised to see melon and mint in the same flavor. The melon is subtle, like honeydew and the mint tastes a lot like candy canes. This gum is really refreshing, just like drinking a cup of juice. Even though the flavor sounds weird and exotic it could seriously become a conventional flavor.

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Mystery of the Spicy Sweet Chili Doritos- now without a review!

Doritos Sweet and Spicy Chiliupdate: I finally found these Doritos and have a review on this snack food here!

Today on the Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert had a huge segment on Doritos funding his escapades again. He practically swam in bags of Dorito’s new Spicy Sweet Chili flavor. They fell from the ceiling as if they were ballons… happy ballons, fill with corn chips. He tossed chips at the audience while he ate them. And as he ate them, he actually didn’t seem to like them much.

I had seen these chips earlier last week and thought about picking them up. I decided against it since sweet chili flavor on chips hasn’t worked out well in my experience. But all this attention they were getting, I figured I’d review them for you guys. It’s not cuz I love you guys, I’m just using you to get to your hot sister.

Well after searching 4 stores after midnight(in the rain, mind you) I still cannot freaking find these things. I’m positive I saw them last week! I’m not crazy, I swear! I can’t remember where I saw them, so I went to my usual places: Walmart, Kroger, Tom Thumb and QT (Quick Trip gas station). No luck. I even tried to call my little brother(who I think saw them with me) at 1am for help. For some strange reason, he wouldn’t answer me. Maybe Doritos took a page from the Nintendo marketing plan and are creating shortages to boost desirability…. or not.

Oh well. When I find them, I’ll be sure to post up a review. Till then, we’ll be following the “Dorito’s Spicy Sweet Pennsylvania Primary Coverage From Chili-Delphia- The City of Brotherly Crunch!” on the Colbert Report! Stay tuned!

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I like my pizza Fuzzy!

Fuzzy’s Pizza on Antoine

My family has been going to Fuzzy’s Pizza & Cafe in Houston for as long as I can remember. We used to go there for big family gatherings – it’s noisy and very casual – a great place for kids. I remember the pizza slices being huge, with a ton of melted cheese and liberally applied greasy pepperoni – it was GREAT! I went to college and moved out of the city, but the memory of Fuzzy’s as the best pizza remained fresh in my memory. I returned for the first time in about 5 years and a lot has changed. The restaurant has doubled in size, they pizza’s more expensive, and they are constantly packed. All that aside – it’s still the best pizza in Houston. The slices aren’t quite as big as I remember them being – but then again, I have grown a bit.

Fuzzy’s makes their sauce and dough from scratch and they use only the freshest ingredients. They’re busy every night so go early for the best service. Speaking of which: I’ve read a lot of complaints of poor quality in food or service. I’ve been several times since my visit to the new Fuzzy’s and I’ve never had anything but the best food. Sometimes the service is weak, but that’s to be expected when a restraint that seats 120 people has 130 people in it and their also processing to-go orders.

Fuzzy’s is also a bit more expensive than the regular Papa Hut-ino’s chain pizza. A large 1 – topping will run you $17 while their large specialty pizza’s run about $23.50. Conveniently, you can also order pizza by the slice for $2.25 + .25 for each standard topping. They offer more than pizza too (but really – who goes to Fuzzy’s and doesn’t order pizza?!) catering to the pasta and hot and cold sandwich crowd as well. In my opinion (and I guess that’s what you’re reading this for) the pizza is well worth the price. I hit up Fuzzy’s every time I’m in town.

Must order: Large New York style Pepperoni pizza on wheat crust. A large pie will feed 3 adults easily. Add a large Greek salad (loaded with kalamata olives, tomatoes, and feta cheese) and you can make it a meal for 5 pretty easily.

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3D tabletop menu: fork-mote not included.

3d table top menu

Check out this cool new 3d menu that TEC in Japan is developing! It’s integrated into your table and lets you browse food options via 3d popup menus. No word on when it’ll be out, but it sounds like a great idea!

Via Engadget

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Review- Taste of Thai- Arlington, TX

Taste of Thai frontAngela and I were driving around hungry with our recent room mate, James(if you ask, he goes by Jim but I refuse), who is somewhat new to the area and has a strong taste for almost all things Asian. The idea of Thai food was brought up, so I figured I’d show him the ones I know of in the area. We ended up at Taste of Thai at Arkansas and 360. I’d seen it before, but never actually dined there. Always up for an adventure, we took a step inside.

The atmosphere inside is very cozy and almost romantic. There are paintings of Southeast Asia on the wall that really built up the ambiance. A few reminded me of something my Cambodian parents would probably have. As a general note about small Asian restaurants, it seems pretty common to have a modest appearance but serve great food. That’s perfectly fine with me, I’m there to eat! Taste of Thai really breaks this mold with a great atmosphere.

They have a huge menu- and I took forever to decide as usual. I went for the Taste of Thai Spicy Beef ($8.95), James had the Panang Curry Chicken ($8.95) and Angela had the Noodles with Chicken in Brown Sauce ($7.75).

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Quinoa- the super grain. Basic steamed preparation and first impressions.

Steamed Quinoa recipeI finally got around to picking some quinoa up from Whole Foods. You can get it bulk there for $2.49/lb. or buy it prepackaged for $1.69 for a pound bag. Both are organic, so I went for prepack. I’ve been hearing alot of buzz about this stuff. Quinoa (pronounced keen-wa) is this ancient super grain that is unusually complete in protein(has all 8 amino acids). Sounds good for you vegetarians out there. I’m no nutrition anthro…. encyclopedia, so here’s what wikipedia has to say about the nutritional qualities:

Quinoa was of great nutritional importance in pre-Columbian Andean civilizations, being secondary only to the potato, and followed in third place by maize. In contemporary times this crop has come to be highly appreciated for its nutritional value, as its protein content is very high (12%–18%). Unlike wheat or rice (which are low in lysine), quinoa contains a balanced set of essential amino acids for humans, making it an unusually complete food. This means it takes less quinoa protein to meet one’s needs than wheat protein. It is a good source of dietary fiber and phosphorus and is high in magnesium and iron. Quinoa is gluten free and considered easy to digest. Because of all these characteristics, quinoa is being considered as a possible crop in NASA’s Controlled Ecological Life Support System for long-duration manned spaceflights.

Well if it’s good enough for the astronaut’s, it’s good enough for me. I love freeze dried ice cream! The real question is whether or not it can replace my white rice I live off of. In fact, you’re supposed to cook with this stuff just like rice.

Preparing steamed quinoa:

  1. Wash the quinoa in cold water. Same thing you do with rice- it gets off any coatings, etc. I’d suggest running water through it with a very small strainer. These things like to float, so be careful not to accidentally pour them down the sink. Maybe try to spritz a little water in there to get them a little wet before you turn the faucet onto it.
  2. Throw it in your rice pot. 1 part quinoa to 2 parts water.
  3. Hit the “cook” button.

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Iron Chef America: Supreme Cuisine Wii game annouced with teaser trailer! And speculation.

A new game for the Nintendo Wii and DS has been announced: Iron Chef America: Supreme Cuisine! This is a game based on the popular American version of Iron Chef. Here’s the incredibly cheesy trailer:

Not much is known about the game yet, but it’ll supposedly let you tackle culinary challenges on your way to becoming the next Iron Chef.Here’s our speculation on the game:Here’s what I expect the game will be:

I doubt that you’ll be able to create your own dishes. There’s just not enough processing power to determine if your dish tastes good. It’ll probably be more like a lot of mini games that lead you to making a dish. First, you’ll use the wiimote to slice your meat and veggies. Then you might season them. Then you grill or fry them, making sure not to burn anything. Then you plate your food. My guess is that this will all be timed to give you the feel of being on Iron Chef. You’ll probably practice in your own kitchen first before actually getting on to the show. At least, I hope they don’t expect you to just jump into Kitchen Stadium as a newbie. It’d be kinda cool if you started as a sous chef for one of the Iron Chefs and challenged them after training under them.

Here’s what I would realistically want/wish(but doubt would get) out of the game. This is a plausible scenario in my opinion. It’d be great to make your own recipes on the fly, but it’d be too hard to judge and have too many variables for programming. I kept in mind that the game would have to feasibly be programmed and also fit on a disk.

I think it should be a story based game where you start off at the bottom and need to earn experience points before you are invited to Iron Chef. You would start off as a fry cook at a burger joint then be promoted to a casual restaurant and so on.

Click “more” for a (very) detailed description of my version of the Iron Chef America Wii game:

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Pringles Extreme Screamin’ Dill Pickle snack food review

Pringles Extreme Screamin’ PickleWow, these must be pretty damn extreme. So extreme that they’re freaking screamin! That’s exactly what I want from my potato chips. Ideally, I want my snacks hopped up on speed and plowing through sheetrock while blaring Dragonforce. I want my chips to kick my teeth in before I get a chance to eat it, then piss in my coffee. EXTREME!

What I don’t necessarily want from my chips is them to taste like pickles. Oh well, it’s a trade off I guess.

When you first open the seal, you get a nice big whiff of the extreme pickleness immediately. I thought: ok, I’ve had pickle chips before and I like salt and vinegar chips. Let’s give them a taste!

I found out why they added the descriptor “Screamin’ ” on the can. It’s not actually describing the chips, but acts as a disclaimer. You will make loud noises when you first taste these. Usually a cough/gasp for air followed by some sort of exclamation. “Damn that’s some extreme pickle there” is a suitable exclamation. I’ll attempt to describe the taste. Imagine if you could compress vinegar with enough force to turn it into a solid. Kind of like Superman squeezing coal into a diamond, but much more useless and smelly. Now, put that in a mason jar with some pickling brine and wait a week. Now, drink the entire jar.

I’m usually all about adding more flavor to chips. Hell, if they sold kilo bricks of Doritos cheese, I’d probably have to pawn my roomate’s TV to support my habit. Apparently, I’ve found my limit for pickle flavor. I can’t eat more than a couple at a time. I’d probably throw them away but it’s fun making other people try them. I could really see this being a great idea to keep around if your wife is pregnant. On second though, it might be better if you keep pregnant women and unborn children away from these Pringles. You wouldn’t want anyone to get hurt by the sheer extremeness of these chips. Plus, there may be a high chance that your wife would give birth to a 7 pound pickle. Boy, wouldn’t that be weird to see coming out of your wife? Feel free to send me a link to those pictures…

Somewhat edible, but way too extreme for me: 2 out of 5 awesomenesses.

Rating= 2

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Jufran Banana Sauce- ketchup without tomatoes?!?

Jufran Filipino Banana KetchupYou read correctly, this is ketchup without tomatoes. And confusingly, they replaced the tomatoes with bananas. I’m not sure how that was the logical jump, but sure why not.

“Crap! We’re out of tomatoes! What’s close enough…. uh.. uhhh… BANANAS! Brilliant!
People dip their fries in chocolate shakes, why not pour bananas on fries? Let’s give it a shot!

I picked this bottle up at the local Asian market in the Filipino section. It looks exactly like ketchup, minus the picture of bananas on the label. It’s not at all chunky like I expected from a condiment made from bananas. It doesn’t taste anything like bananas either! It tastes like ketchup, but sweeter. They almost hit it dead on, but they seemed to forget a good deal of the vinegar that gives ketchup it’s tang.

So now that we’ve determined that it’s ketchup, the next obvious question is: WHY?!? Apparently this was invented during the Japanese occupation of the Philippines during the mid 1940’s. They couldn’t get their hands on American ketchup, so they made their own. It seems like they use it the same as we do for the most part. One interesting use for it though is in Filipino spaghetti. No spaghetti sauce and meatballs here. They use straight up banana sauce with hot dogs or vienna sausages, topped with grated cheddar. Sounds like it was invented in a college dorm. And by that, I mean delicious.

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Life, Cheetos and Flaming Hot Sex

I recently reviewed the newest flavor from Cheetos. It got me wondering if you can measure maturity based on Cheeto preference.

In high school, for me it was all about Flaming Hot Cheetos. That’s what life is like as a teenager: EXTREME! You think you’re invincible and will stick anything in your mouth that’s exciting or spicy. (maybe that was just me…)

I’ve gotten a little older and now prefer Cheddar Jalepeno as my cheese snack of choice. I do revisit my old friend Flaming Hot from time to time, but mostly to prove that I can still hold my own. Cheddar Jalepeno Cheetos still offer a little spice in my life, but are mild enough to enjoy with mixed company. It’s sort of like trading in your sports car for a sedan, but you install rims and exhaust on the sedan to show you’re still cool.

I imagine that as I get older, my taste for Cheetos will get more and more mild. Some day, I’ll be gumming on Cheetos Puffs telling my grandchildren about the awesome ‘91 Honda Prelude I used to drive. With Flaming Hot fingerprints all over the upholstery. From the Flaming Hot sex I was getting. Then my granchildren will throw up and we’ll all have a good laugh.


Cheetos timeline

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Cheesy Enchilada Cheetos- Dangerously Awesome Review

What makes Cheetos so dangerous? I haven’t read any news articles blaming Cheetos for crime rates like the iPod. Maybe we should blame Cheetos. That cheetah is up to no good. Just watch the latest commercials for Cheetos. Chester is sneaking in and out of the shadows, enlisting innocent people to perform acts of civil disobedience. We’ve got to stop these random acts of Cheetos. And I’ll thank you not to shove Cheetos in my nostrils, Chester. Cheetos belong in my mouth.

Cheesy Enchilada Cheetos reviewEspecially these new Cheesy Enchilada Cheetos. I picked them up at Kroger- 2 bucks on sale- and DAMN are they good. For the cheese-puff-related record, here’s how I prefer my Cheetos. In order from favorite to least: Cheddar Jalepeno, Flaming Hot, Puffs, Classic. Yes, I put old school crunchy at the bottom of my list. These jump right on up there, right smack even with Flaming Hot. Tied for second!

They’re your classic crunchy form of Cheeto, with an extra kick of flavor. I actually don’t do enchiladas that much, so I didn’t expect much out of these. But these are great! They’ve got a dash of chili and cumin; not enough to be spicy, but enough to be freaking awesome. Repeat munchability factor is high.

Perhaps that cheetah is onto something. Maybe I’ll join the Orange Underground. You think they give you free Cheetos?

I give this a 4 out of 5 on the awesomeness meter!

Cheeto’d meter 4

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Mario Brothers cupcakes!

Check out these ridiculously awesome cupcakes from Clever Cupcakes in Montreal. Slashfood posted these today and they are a marriage of two of my favorite passions: food and video games. They’re made out of fondant and they’re super cute! Too bad you can’t get these unless you’re in Montreal or I’d be munching on some Goomba right now. Pair it with the Atari cake and you’ve got the best freaking birthday party evar!

Mario Brothers cupcakes from Clever Cupcakes

Picture and original post at Slashfood

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